Wednesday, December 31, 2008
I am Joy. I was studying for my engineering degree in a very reputed/costly college in Ooty. Putting an end to all guesses, I couldn’t be termed as smart from the general society perspective. Society feels that way as I didn’t get good marks in 12th exams. Didn’t get, sounds like somebody didn’t give me what I deserved. Ha! Ha! Nope, that was not the reason, studying of those text books, for the heck of scoring marks didn’t appeal to me and hence resulted in my low marks. Like any other family, my family had hopes of me doing well in life. My father being autocratic in nature wanted to make something out of his stupid son. He gave loads of money and got me admitted into this Engineering College.
I was not sure what to do with my life, and had heard Ooty was a nice place, decided to go ahead with my fathers plans without much of a fuss. I used stay at the college campus, which was run on the principles of a prison. Some of my early friends in college told that, the college was built on IIT principles and was the next best thing under the sun. Who cares?!! I didn’t make many friends later on.
The college had strict rules of attending classes and students going out of the campus. Hence, invariably I used to spend my energetic young age in classes drawing crap on my note books. I was what you can call as sub-dued individual.
It was during the start of my 8th semester classes, One day Ms. Ranjana entered our class as she was supposed to teach Operations Research (OR). Though, I had seen her around in the college earlier, that day, in the full view on the class platform, she looked very beautiful to me. She was wearing a simple Saree and no make-up. I watched her closely through out the class. In fact, my eyes were always concentrated on her and her movements through out the hour.
Incidentally, one of the subjects I like is Mathematics. God knows why?!! Aimless playing around with numbers and formulas to achieve nothing made sense to me. Somewhere, I had read, human mind will find a liking for something even when put in a no-hope place like prison. I can relate my scenario to this statement now. Operations Research was a subject which is application of Mathematics and it was very obvious that I would like it.
After the classes were over, I aimlessly wandered around the college, as per my general habit. Went to some quiet places, burned some cigarettes, played with ants, disturbed some grass. It was a summer day and had got dark an hour back. I wandered into Mess, had my dinner and went back to my room. State of my mind was what can be termed as “Blank”. I was on my bed, reading a national geographic magazine. It was a nice article about the mating habits of Lions. Suddenly, the thought struck to me that, Ms. Ranjana was “sad”. God knows why?!! How?!! But, a sudden clarity appeared in my mind that Ms. Ranjana was sad.
Over next few days, I attended all her classes with complete concentration on her. I also enquired about her with some class mates and seniors. It looks like Ms. Ranjana topped the gossip list in our college. It seems she was divorced from husband, and living with her daughter in staff quarters. Nobody had any conclusive stories though; it was like any other gossip in college. I started relating the “sadness” of Ms. Ranjana to this story and felt an element of truth in the rumour. This thought of sadness, bought me closer to her.
After 3-4 weeks of my concentration on Ranjana, I noticed that every 5 minutes, she would glance at me. Initially I was embarrassed, and used to turn my head in other direction. This was a surprise, which I had not anticipated and was not sure how to handle this. I started noticing that, Ranjana started glancing towards me more often. I cannot explain the emotions I was going through, but I guess it was a mixture of elation and fear. I was not sure what was happening and my next step in life was unknown.
I wandered around the campus with the same emotions for 2 weeks. During these 2 weeks, my boldness increased and I also realised that I had not studied even a bit of Operations Research. I shortened my evening walks to the mountain and started studying. Unfortunately, my concentration on Ranjana didn’t allow me to concentrate on the subject in the class.
As I was having my lunch one day, I felt a huge urge to see Ranjana. I finished my lunch quickly, went to my room and jotted down some doubts I had in Operations Research. I went in search of Ranjana in the staff room. She was surprised to see me in the staff room. I stumbled a bit while entering the room and with hesitation asked her about my doubts. She was very calm and gracious and explained me the solutions to the problems. But, I couldn’t understand very clearly what she was teaching me. I guess, my anxiety had increased my heart beats and clouded my mind.
The staff of the college stayed in the quarters around 1.5 KMs away from the student hostel. Anybody can guess that the staff didn’t want to live in a Jail like environment. Near the staff quarters were some shops and this used to be the place where most smokers bought there cigarettes. It was around 7:30 PM in the evening and I decided to take a walk to buy cigarettes. I bought a pack of cigarettes and as I was walking back across the quarters, saw a big tree and stood below it. I lighted a cigarette and started taking long drags. I saw Ranjana walking down the pathway on the hill with her daughter. They were both dressed in track suits. I waited for some more time, under the tree, saw them entering the house. I could see the silhouette of Ranjana walking around in the house.
I dreamed of her the whole night.
No points for guessing, I started going to Gymnasium. I figured out in just 2-3 days that Ranjana and her daughter used to come around 7 and leave around 8. I scheduled my going to Gym everyday at the same time. I was in pretty bad shape by then, and had gained 20 Kilos compared to my days of 12th. It was difficult days initially and I didn’t dare to talk to Ranjana. Most of the people in the Gym would leave by 7:30. After 2 weeks of going to Gym, I dared to say a hello to her. She responded back with a Hello. I thought she was a bit conservative in the Gym because of her daughter. She used to chat and talk about things when I used to go to clarify doubts in Staff Room.
During this period, I felt she was getting closer and closer to me. We used to talk about weather, movies, college life, etc. in the staff room. Though it only used to be for 5 mins, I used to feel a high after the talk. I used to go for a walk around staff quarters and enjoy the silhouette of Ranjana once in a while.
One fine day, Ranjana came to college well made-up and wearing a beautiful silk saree. She was looking beautiful. I don’t know how my eyes, stopped from popping out of sockets. She looked very cheerful, and I felt was more cheerful when I went to ask doubts at staff room. The trend of her dressing up for college continued for next 2 weeks. We were nearing the exams, and I was worst prepared compared to previous 3 semesters. Anybody can guess my state of mind.
God knows why, I got up at 5 o’clock in the morning. I was full of energy and couldn’t let myself to sleep again. I went for a long walk on the mountain and was having a smoke. I was trying to think of what was happening with my life, I was in love, probably infatuated to an older woman. She was probably divorced and that didn’t matter to me. I started thinking clearly on what’s my future, and how I would continue with my life. I was sure; my parents would go mad hearing the news. It was funny imagining my father’s response to this news. I am sure he would have hit the ceiling in rage.
Next 2 weeks of life was filled with negative feelings. More or less I always used to think about good or bad and what does future hold for me. One of these days, Ranjana entered the class and announced that, she would be on a leave for 2 months and Mr. Selvatheertam would take our Operations Research to conclusion. Who cares?!! Needless to say I was disappointed, and Ms. Ranjana never glanced at me during the announcement. The rumour factory came with the news that Ms. Ranjana’s husband was indeed alive and abroad. It seems she was taking 2 months leave to go abroad.
My thought process of right, wrong and future continued vigorously after hearing this news. This is when, I realised; I even do not know Ms. Ranjana’s response. There was a good probability of me imagining that Ms. Ranjana finds solace in me. She has a daughter who is probably 14-15. For me, it didn’t make sense and the end was unclear.
In this confusion, I went for evening walk to the mountain. After lighting my second cigarette, In the sane environment of setting sun, I realised that I was not considering the whole picture. I was not sure, what will happen to my life?, where will I live?, whats my relationship with her daughter?, how will she react?, where will we work?, what will neighbours say?, what if society doesn't accept us?. There were questions and only questions, and there was no way I could think of getting my relationship to work.
I realised my childishness very clearly.
I could see the end.
I was getting sane.
I continued with my not-so-studious studies and went on with my life. I forgot about Ms. Ranjana and my love for her in a short time.
Today, on the eve of my 40th birthday, I am thinking,
“Was I really Sane?”
"Was I afraid of barriers?"
Monday, December 29, 2008
The necessity of Dust Bin is even needed in a virtual world, and hence every computer comes with “Recycle Bin”, which does its job of collecting waste. Though the primary purpose of Dust Bin is to collect and segregate the waste, unfortunately, in computers, people named it as Recycle Bin, which is a secondary use of a Dust Bin.
Dust Bin’s come in various sizes and forms. In a typical Indian house, it would typically be an aged plastic vessel which has retired from its primary purpose (Water Bucket, paint box etc.). It’s funny that in an Indian house hold, a vessel which has retired never gets classified as waste, but gets used as waste collector Dust Bin. This is a very interesting nature of enterprising Indian house hold I guess. From an Indian view point, any vessel like structure which can hold piece of matter can become a Dust Bin.
Modern people have shown ingenuity in creating Bins in new shapes and forms. Some examples are, Bins which can opened by foot pedal, bins with swiveling tops which helps in automatic closure, bins which come in colourful pictures, etc. etc. Dust Bin’s have been made from plastic, steel, copper, silver, gold (anything and everything) etc. Reader might be startled by seeing Gold in the list. Rich people in India, used gold or silver bins to spit the Pan Juice (Juice created when one chews betel leaves with nuts and tobacco). In the modern world, the quality of Dust Bins, also determines of the status and culture of an individual, hence, has gained value in its status.
It is difficult to say, what point in time of the human evolution, Dust Bin was invented. In the historic world, the collected waste was used as manure in the farm lands or in the Garden. One could guess this was one of the reasons, why people started collecting the waste. As the world created lot of crap in the name of science and ease of use. Usage and processing of waste became a bigger challenge to the modern world.
One of the interesting characteristics of Dust Bin is, every individual at some point of time in their life have skimmed through the contents to find something. Most searches for lost materials in any place either start or end at the Dust Bin. It is also interesting, the amount of useful things which can be found in a Dust Bin in searches like this. One can relate Dust Bin to Pandora’s Box in such scenarios.
There are a lot of professions in modern world that are dependent on Dust Bins. The collection of Dust Bins of the clients and skimming through them for information is the first step of any detective assignment. Interestingly, detectives do not have a hesitation in skimming through waste of their targets. This is one of the professions which value the Dust Bins and the content within it.
In the bigger cities, big business institutions have been born to manage the huge amount of waste produced by the population of the city. Dust Bins are a bread earner to people employed in these industries. These organisations deal with Dust Bins of various sizes and shapes and can be called as experts in the area. I guess if there was a God for Dust Bins, people in these industries would be worshiping them. Interestingly, India being a country of multiple Gods has not created one for Dust Bins. It is shame on the modern India for not having created a God for Dust Bins.
Other than the formal professions, there are individuals who have made a profession out of searching through the Dust Bins of streets, area etc. These people make a living by searching, finding and selling material found in these Bins. These people can be typically be found in cities skimming through the Dust Bins, in search of plastic, wooden, metal, paper etc. Dust Bin is such an instrument, which holds the things which are waste for one set of people and also things that are valuable for another set of people.
Dust Bins, have been the source of art also in the modern era. Various artists have created wonderful art works out of the stuff from the Dust Bins. House wives of 1970-80 eras, were very skillful in creating art out of the material from the Dust Bin. This breed of artists, have increased the status of Dust Bins in the modern era by seeing art in the contents of the Dust Bin. Thanks to these artists, peoples knowledge of Dust Bin has increased.
Dust Bin, have been reason for humour from age old times. There have been funny scenarios enacted in movies, dramas, stories, showing the incidents around searching for material in the Dust Bins. The scene from the movie Pushpak where an individual finds a neatly covered package in the Dust Bin, and ends up in a mental asylum is part of the folklore in India.
Dust bin is a symbol of equality, in this god-forbidden world of in-equalities. This is the only place, which can hold gold, paper, religious texts, non-religious texts, money, dust, etc. etc. without worrying about the perceived value of the material. It brings equality to all matter, by segregating the perceived false notions of material from truth.
Next time, when you see a Dust Bin do not get disgusted by it, instead remember the values offered by it and say a small prayer to God.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
expressed.Look around; smiles are everywhere.None is so rich or mighty that he can get along without it, and none is so poor but that he can be made rich by it.Smiles can make your worst imaginable day into something that is bearable. It brings rest to the weary, cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad, and is nature's best antidote for trouble. Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given away.It is a need to communicate understanding and sympathy. Words over a telephone line, no matter how eloquent and beautiful cannot convey the same feelings as a honest smile
A smile creates happiness in the home, fosters good will in business, and is the countersign of friendship.A smile helps us display our feelings to the world wether Rich or poor, black or white, boy or girl everyone deserves a smile. Smiles all convey some type of emotion that is tangible and real. A joy that can be felt and almost held. A smile is as warm as an embrace but as simple as a sunrise.Smiles can be one of the most romantic things in the world. A communication without words. An understanding of emotions and character. A smile reflects a feeling that is so universally understood that it is too hard to define. Without smiles there is nothing in life to look forward to.
A smile is like a time machine. It can bring you back to the days of your childhood.It will fill you with so much raw emotion that you just wanna scream out to the world that life is good. Sometimes a smile from a close friend will make you break down and cry or just burst out into hysterical laughter. Smiles are contagious. They make a complete stranger sitting next to you want to smile. Just try it some time, smile at a stranger and see the reaction you get.
Why do you think that people smile when they have their photo taken? Its to capture a happy moment. A moment that can be looked back upon during a day of hopelessness and despair so that you can forget your worries. A way of saying, "Hey, that was one of the best days in my life!". Its a way to block out all the negatives and reflect on all the positives. An extension of the soul that is so easy, so right and so pure that anyone can do it and no one can deny it.
Happy New Year 2009 with lots of fun and Smile.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
"discount sale happening here in Goa on all brands due to less crowds. u guys can tell me the choice"
Reader might get surprised by the above statement, as view of the world on this movie is
"The film tells the story of a man and his epic journey through life meeting historical figures, influencing popular culture and experiencing first-hand historic events of the 20th century while being largely unaware of their significance, due to his low intelligence" (source: Wikipedia)
For me this movie is about "Story of a man and his journey of life, being an example of the way to LIVE LIFE. The movie depicts the hypocrisy of the world contrasting it with the life of a so called stupid individual".
Though the character of Forrest is fictional, I believe, the character is realistic. In other words, there is a huge possibility that character like Forrest living with us in flesh and blood. Objective of this review is to explain how inspirational character of Forrest is.
The movie starts with depicting the life of Forrest, who is "Stupid" (so called), below IQ individual. Movie depicts half of Forrest's life and his amazing achievements in life, some achievements are, being part of All-American Football team, excelling in military training, getting a medal for military service, becoming a ping-pong champion, becoming a shrimp business tycoon, etc. etc.
Most of the movie reviews attribute these achievements as "Accidental". This definition doesn't make sense, as any achievement needs a lot of work put in by an individual and doesn't happen by luck. It is loser's definition to term achievement as an accident or luck. It is failure of the reviewer to understand what made the individual achieve those feats. Forrest had some amazing characteristics which made him achieve what he did. To name a few they are Focus, Love towards everything, Art of Living.
Through out his life, Forrest comes across as a very focused individual. Depiction of his focus starts with the running episode, when he is bullied by his friends. His focus on running allows him to give out his best efforts. This results in Forrest being the best runner around. When he is included in the football team, his focus remains on running rather than other skills of football. Because of his focus on running, his team derives value and he gets into the All-American team.
Another example of focus, comes when he is in the military training. His expression and the body language while he is assembling a Gun show this focus and conviction on the work. The result, speaks for itself as he becomes the best in assembling the rifle.
Focus on the job is best displayed, when Forrest carries the wounded soldiers to safety without even caring for his life. The best example of focus is when he forcefully carries his captain to safety in-spite of protests from him. This is what is called as commitment to work. Through out his life, focus of Forrest is displayed in each and every activity, be it playing Ping-Pong, be it catching shrimp, be it running, be it telling a story, for that matter, anything in the movie he does is focused with heart, mind and soul.
Is there anything impossible for man of such focus?
How many people have you seen who can show this focus and determination in their job?
Is Forrest stupid?
The movie contrasts the focus of Forrest with the Hypocrisy of the general world. The world tries to solve problems by killing presidents and people, waging war, worrying about how war is bad, people taking into drugs, captain worrying about the lost glory by not dying in war. But Forrest is focused on Living his life by doing work, without worrying about things out of his control.
Are these people intelligent?
Are these people of high IQ?
Have these people achieved anything?
There is not a single moment in the movie when, Forrest shows hate against anything or anybody. He doesn't show hate against his bullying mates, school mates who doesn't want to be seen with him, his girl friend who rejects him, his captain who hates him. There is no trace of hate in Forrest through out his life.
In fact, he loves them all.
He shows the pure love for everything life has to offer. He loves Bubba, Jenny and Lt. Dan for what they are. He respects everybody for what they are. Forrest was an individual who lived life according to the teachings of great philosophers and beings like Jesus, Buddha, Gandhi etc. Love it all. Love them all.
In the incident when there is a commotion near the college of allowing African-American people into the college, Forrest displays his natural love by picking up the book dropped by an African-American female and giving it back to her. The act comes very natural to Forrest because of his love for everybody. The incident depicts the qualities of natural respect and love for all from Forrest. Whereas, the world has to force itself to accept an African-American entering college with whites. And the world believes, it is a great incident and celebrates with pomp and show.
The most defining moment of the movie is when 2 individuals whom Forrest loves transform themselves to Live Life, instead of Dying their Life.
Lt. Dan, transforms out of his sorrows and teaches himself to Live life. He gets himself an artificial leg and pulls himself out of his distress and sorrow of his life.
Jenny, quits all the bad habits, and starts living life as a waitress. When Forrest meets Jenny at the end of the movie, glow in the face and positive body language of Jenny depicts the happy state of mind.
In any other times of world, this achievements would have been called as miracles. These are the miracles which Jesus and Buddha performed. Forrest's love for them and love for the world, is what made Jenny and Lt. Dan see the light of the matter and learn to live life.
Can a stupid person achieve such miracles?
Is Jenny, Lt. Dan so called intelligent people really intelligent?
Art of Living:
Forrest is one of those few guys under sun who knew the Art of Living.
There are number of spiritual courses, workshops, etc. which teach people to keep a positive mindset. People flock to these courses to get a peace of mind. They just have to see Forrest Gump live his life, to learn the art of living.
In-spite of various deficiencies, Forrest never shows any sort of negative emotions through out his life. Through out his life, Forrest is a picture of peace. No other emotion came to my mind, other than peace, while seeing Forrest Gump living his life. A small tinge of negative emotion is displayed, when his mother dies, when Forrest feels he is alone. But the negative emotion is very momentary, he goes on Living his life to the fullest enjoying whatever he is doing.
Forrest, never cribs, worries about anything external life/world has offered him. This is in-spite of the fact that, external world doesn't offer him anything good. He goes on living his life, be it running, football, army, vietnam, ping-pong, shrimp business, mowing lawn. Anything and everything he does, is with conviction and commitment and hence the he becomes the picture of peace.
Contrasting this to the world, all the happenings around the world was filled with negativity and hate. Most of incidents, be it killing of president and important people, or be it anti-war processions, had a huge amount of negative emotions associated with them. Forrest was the only example of complete positive mindset and the knower of Living Life.
Do you think Forrest was unaware of the significance of Life?
Did 20th century world understand the significance?
If the world learns even 10% of the characteristics of Forrest, it would be a better place to Live.
Finally, My heart full thanks and salute to each and every one involved in creation of such a character and a story. I am blessed to watch Forrest Gump.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
1) A blind man
2) The blind man's wife
3) A one legged man
4) A dumb person(a person who cant speak). Not dumb in any other sense
The one legged man kissed the blind man's wife. The dumb fellow saw that. How will he tell that to the blind person?
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
I was always, confused with the concept of paintings and need to confess, never understood the concept clearly. There was a time, when I thought people were making bakra out of general people by drawing some stuff :-) and naming it as art. And Painting as art always used to be tagged with the saying "Only intellectuals can understand" which I do not appreciate much. Hence, I was not much impressed with my friends idea of taking me to painting competition.
My friends argument was, The competition was open for students of painting schools only. The students quality of knowledge of painting was pretty good. He also explained me, how he had an opportunity to see, some of the works of these students and how he was impressed with the quality.
The subject of painting competition was "Independence Struggle".
Process of Painting:
Only products I had created as a process of my thoughts were, software products. Funnily enough, I ended up comparing the process the artists followed to achieve there end product of painting with my experience of creating software products. This comparison, came to my mind while I was pondering over the subject on my way back to Bangalore.
I could classify the structure of an artists thought process to below 3 process steps,
1) Scoping - Scoping is about identifying the layout of the painting. Artists identified different sections (modules) of the painting and defined boundary on the canvas. Typically people used, proper geometric devices to arrive at the layout of the painting. This is the initial step and for me, this basically defined the clarity in the mind of participants on how they are going to create the end product.
To relate it to the IT world, this is a sort of high level architecture of the end product.
2) Structuring - This was a stage, when all the participants used hand drawings to represent the structure of the end result. This had more drawings with curves, figures, people, etc., this can be called as rough sketch of end product. In this step there was more clarity on what the end result would look like.
Relating it to the IT world, I will relate this to something like a low level design.
I need to confess, I couldn't follow 80% of the sketches. I never could guess, how the end product might look like. In some of the cases, which I could guess, I ended up being terribly mistaken at the end. I guess, the way each individual designed their end product was different and for a third party like me (and novice), it would be difficult to understand the perspective.
3) Development - This is the step during which, people took up their paint brushes, and started painting their end products. I was awestruck by the amount of detail in which they were going to choose a color and mix it. And some of them startled me with their skills of layering their structure on top of the other structure they had already painted. The foresight of the artist to achieve his end result through this layering method astonished me.
While watching this step in action, I really couldn't guess, how a painting would end-up even in a single case. I guess this is the power of true creativity of the individual, and my inability to understand artists thoughts.
To relate this stage to the IT world, this is more like coding stage. Where an individual is trying to execute the design and give a practical form. The margin of correction is very low in case of a painting, which is unlike analytical world (IT).
The first 2 stages, helped artists to make the idea concrete, using analytical techniques. And then the pure creativity in execution flows, is what I felt seeing the process.
About the paintings itself,
I was awestruck by the variety of thoughts, through which people represented the "Independence Struggle". During the start of the competition, I also started thinking about how I would represent this subject in a picture. My brain stopped working, once I started to
think :-) whatever levels I tried, couldn't come up with an "Visual Idea" to represent independence. Need to think sometime in life about why I couldn't come with an image?, What part of me doesn't work? etc.etc. Probably I am suffering from unnamed mental problem which is completely opposite of Dyslexia.
Coming back to the variety, I was impressed, as most of the artists (Around 50%) used the idea of independence, which has nothing to do with "Indian Independence Struggle". Me, coming from the background of Gandhi's thinking, "true freedom is 'freedom of mind' rather than freedom of the nation from British" liked the idea very much.
Some of the representations of Independence struggle were,
1) Independence of society from wine, cigarettes and other social problems;
2) Independence of society from AIDS;
3) Some of the female artists were writing about Independence from dowry problems, female Infanticide, AIDS etc..
to look at the funny side,
there was one person, who had immersed Indian map in a wine Glass :-) ha ha ha :-)
there was another drawing, where I was not clear if he was asking people to drink/smoke/etc.. or stop them :-)
Sad side of the affair was, I think all the artists represented the Independence Struggle with a negative concept. to top, this I couldn't even think of a positive way to represent this subject.
Frankly, there was no way in which I could have chosen first/second/third from the lot of around 50-60 paintings. Again, my analytical brain failed to think of a way to segregate the paintings as best/better etc.. I got a opportunity to talk to a internationally acclaimed painter who was one of the judges.
My first question to him was "How will you evaluate this?"
His answer was simple,
First step - We will evaluate and eliminate based on craft. The elements of craft are,
a) Lines (Differentiation between different sections of the paintings show the brush skills of artist)
b) Colors (how presentable were the color combination etc.. )
The second step was to judge, how an individual has been able to represent the concept of competition. The judge agreed that this was a very difficult part, as understanding of what an individual has represented needs understanding of individuals mind. I couldn't discuss the nitti-gritties of this step with the evaluators, as they had to started the process of evaluation by then.
At the end, I didn't agree with some of their evaluations :-)
But overall it was a very pleasing experience for my senses, and I need to say, I thoroughly enjoyed each of the painting time and again. In hindsight, I enjoyed the effort I put in to try understand, the painters perspective of subject. It was a very fulfilling experience. Starting from my initial worry of attending the competition, I had spent around 6-7 hours on that day looking at different works of the artists (multiple times). This experience, has helped me look at paintings and art in general from a different perspective.
This is how, I ended up with this definition for painting, "painting is a expression of individuals thoughts through color and picture". I further have, abstracted this to "all art forms" and "all things creative" saying "All art forms are expression of thoughts of an individual".
Monday, December 8, 2008
Art is a selective re-creation of reality according to an artist’s metaphysical value-judgments. - Ayn Rand
Recently, I got an opportunity to interact with one of my favorite writer during my adolescent age, Mr.Yandamoori Veerandranath. Off late he has stopped writing popular novel, instead concentrating on personality development workshops and social service through education. Apart from popular novel, he had written some nice serious novels. If you are brought up in south India, it is very difficult miss him. You might have read his book/translated book or might have watched movies based on his novels etc. I sent him an email urging him to return to novel writing, not flimsy or glossy or popular but meaningful and serious. To which he replied;
"Thank u very much for your kind letter. A person's greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated. Your letter boosts up the passion and gusto of a writer like me for better works. "
I was bit surprised to note such a famous writer says this!!! Even he needs appreciation to write what he believes meaningful.
Yes whenever artist creates something, he would like share his creation with others and would be keen on getting opinions of others. A good constructive opinion and appreciation would encourage him to create more and feel exalted.
What if it is otherwise?
Was there any artist, who never cared for opinions or appreciation? Yes there were many in the history. But I think they didn't come in contact with people who would think in same wave length. Or their fight was with institution or institutional beliefs.
What if artist creates something to which no one shows favorable opinion except himself? This is where artistic conviction and self belief of artist will be tested. There are many instances where people were not appreciated as they were ahead of their times. Example: Socrates drinking hemlock instead of preaching what he did not believe in. People writing novels or poems in different style or in theme than what is believe to be tradition or convention.
There are plenty of people who went against tide or popular belief. All the new things you see in this world are result of that.
Like Ayn Rand said "Every man should live for his own happiness and no one is sacrificial animal for others happiness". I strongly believe that self conviction and belief are more important than other’s appreciation in Art. Do you have them in you? Then go ahead create your own form of art or what you believe in, with out compromise or with out caring /worrying about other’s opinion!
P.S: Our own poet Dr. Shivarudrappa's line
ಎದೆ ತುಂಬಿ ಹಾಡಿದೆನು
ಎಲ್ಲ ಕೇಳಲಿ ಎಂದು ನಾನು ಹಾಡುವುದಿಲ್ಲ
ಹಾಡುವುದು ಅನಿವಾರ್ಯ ಕರ್ಮ ನನಗೆ!
ಹಾಡೋ ಹಕ್ಕಿಗೆ ಬೇಕೆ ಬಿರುದು ಸನ್ಮಾನ ...
At the same there is absolutely nothing wrong for getting appreciated for your creativity or art. Treat other's appreciation as by-product not as the main objective.
Friday, December 5, 2008
With this thought, I stood in front of the Rijks Museum in Amsterdam last weekend contemplating if I could better utilize the 2 hrs and 10 Euros elsewhere instead of investing here. I thought I am too much of a real world man to waste time and money in such activities. There were three reasons that made me take the plunge. Firstly, what if I was off track about art and artists? Secondly, the very fact that I have never walked this path, absolutely new territory for me and thirdly, it was freezing my balls cold outside.
My partner tagged along not particularly happy with the entry fee. He let a sigh when I told him that the head phones for information would cost an additional four Euros. Five minutes into the first gallery and I was already regretting it. There was a large painting where people crowded and whispered among themselves in false admiration. I decided to keep walking and make it through the ordeal. To make things easier, I put on the head phones and punched in the number next to the painting.
She had the most beautiful voice, the story teller, who told me the painters name (that I had never heard off before) and the story of how after a hard fought battle in the high seas between the Dutch and Spanish navies the commander of the victorious Dutch Navy celebrated with his lieutenants. I now knew that I could ride this wave listening to stories and was glad that I got myself the head phone.
Not all paintings or artifacts had numbers next to it, so I had to painstakingly read through the description next to them arching taller than the shorter ones who thought it was their birthright to stand in front. Every painting had a story, sometimes more than one story and I must say it was visually appealing and I felt a sense of admiration creep in. I brushed it aside forgiving myself for false hopes. There was a painting of people making merry, drinking, flirting with women and playing with pets one of which was a chained monkey. It seemed to suggest that indulgence was tolerated or even encouraged as long as desire was not let loose.
The were other messages of virtue and vice and soon I found myself punching the same button over twice in front of some paintings. It dawned on me that it was not the recording I wished to hear again, neither was it the voice of the storyteller. Some of the paintings cause a fixation that reaches out to within you. When I saw Rembrandt’s self portrait it had a hypnotizing effect that leaves behind all trace of space and time and I stared into it as if to communicate with the master. It felt like the effect of the first pint of beer I had. The first revelation of intoxication. The only difference here was that there was no way of replicating it. I felt, I found something here.
The eye chooses what it wiches to sees and the ear what it wants to hear. I heard the stories but now I was more interested on how was such magic created. The storyteller exposed to me the science of painting. The principles of light and shadow, the approach to infinity, the rules of motion and inertia, the subtleties of emotion and so on. These paintings were not the result of a sporadic inspiration which is articulated momentarily. These painting took months of research on requirement and months to design. The details needed to be practiced till it becomes second nature before execution on the real thing. This was no more art, this was science. I was sure I have found something here.
It was dark when I got out of the Museum; I had spent more than 4 hours in there. I did find something but I had more questions than answers. Had I been wrong all along? Is it the general effect ones profession has on oneself? Is that why hard rock music stars needed long hair where ever it grows, piercing in the most remote corners and had to have marijuana for breakfast, coke for lunch and LCD for dinner? Why is the painting credited by the painter than by what is painted or who commissioned the painting? How am I going to be remembered 400 years from now?
What I did find is that I am an artist myself and this note is my product. Though I don’t wear weird clothes (I don’t think I wear), I still search for like minded individuals like yourselves to consume my product. But why am I creating this product? It’s certainly just not for your consumption. The objective of this product is to seek appreciation and admiration. The hunger for praise which I ridiculed in the post earlier is the very reason for the existence of this article. We seek this both from ourselves and from others. The ratio of this however I am not aware of.
P.S.: This article is named Calisthenics, for lack of an appropriate name. The Objective of Art seemed equally cliche' but boring. It’s probably my hope that the reader derives that it has been an emotional and mental exercise.
She was smart.
She was fair.
She was tall.
It was 6:30 in the morning on May 17th, she glowed under the dim light of rising sun. She looked like a goddess to me in the middle of a Malleswaram road. She waved her hands with the ease of a bird waving its wings. I stopped. She wanted to go to MG Road. Words didn't come out of my mouth, my heads and limbs moved involuntarily asking her to sit. My heart was pumping blood, my limbs were shaking a bit. I took a deep breath, to calm my nerves, shifted to first gear and drove towards MG Road.
It was a beautiful day, women were selling flowers and vegetable on the pavement. Some people were out on the street buying vegetables and flowers. Everybody looked happy. Everything looked beautiful. It was just another ordinary day in Malleswaram. The beauty with me, made the day extra ordinary for me. I was skipping beats of heart, I was sweating on a beautiful day with a light breeze.
I could smell, the jasmine scent from her, in the light breeze. I drove slower than normal, in fact I left my formula one instincts and enjoyed the drive. I have never enjoyed my drive, so much as that day. The traffic on a early morning was less, not many people crossing the road and not many irritating drivers on the road. I didn't even realize that, I couldn't see a "Formula One" call center cabs on the road. oh! it was a Cab strike, I realized, and blessed the Cab owners for their strike.
There was one thing missing, I had worked the whole night and was in a bad shape. I wish I had a bath in the morning. I wish I was well dressed. I wish the tobacco smell was not present.
As I drove down the road, I dreamed of, how good my life would be, with her as a companion. How she would, wake me up with a beautiful cup of coffee. How beautiful the day would be, if I saw her face every morning. etc. etc. I was just another normal human being, and I had small dreams. I used to work 17 hours day, to earn money and bring some security in life. My dreams were small, and each and every cell of my body knew for instinct that, she was the one who could make me happy.
I adjusted, the rear view mirror to look at her. She was sitting majestically with her legs crossed. Wow! what a face, what a beautiful soft smile she had on her lips. I could see that, she was enjoying the beautiful day with the eyes open. Wow! what beautiful eyes they were. Oops! a bloody cow crossed the road, I quickly and softly applied the breaks and tackled the situation smoothly. Guess what, I had to make an impression, right? I started to concentrate back on the road, but never forgot to get a glimpse of her once in a while. Funnily enough, I didn't get angry. I would have swore at the cow and the people who had left the cow on the road, with the choicest of words, any other day. I always patted myself on my swearing skills and my creativity in that area.
I started to remember, how she sounded when she talked. Such a beautiful voice, I had never heard before. Four syllables, of MG road was what I had heard, and it rang in my ears again and again. Funnily, I tried to imagine, how she would sound when she says, "Ri, can you please take your coffee?". Ha ha ha, only Sushmita's, voice rang in my ears. I remembered watching the movie "Mein Hun Na", afternoon on the previous day. I kicked Sushmita out of my head, and waited to hear her voice again.
I asked, "Where in MG Road, do you want to go?", my heart started beating faster as I spoke, and missed some syllables in between. You can guess my eagerness to listen to her voice again. She told, "Prestige Meridian". That's it! I was disappointed a bit, but remembered that there is always another opportunity to hear her speak. I didn't forget to get a view of her, once in a while.
She was a Goddess!
I reached Prestige Meridian on MG Road and stopped. She looked at me and said, "It should be just 40 Rs from Malleswaram, and your meter shows 50 Rs. I come here everyday, and I will give 40 Rs. only". The words as she spoke were song to my ears, and I replied "hun!". She was a bit perplexed by seeing my reaction. For the first time in the day, I saw her making a face which wouldn't be called beautiful. I didn't like the look and forced myself to forget it.
As she crossed the road, I kept watching her walk across. And once she entered the building, I smiled to myself, dropped the plans of working till afternoon (on a Cab strike day) and decided to go home and hope to dream of her in my sleep.
She had made my day.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
It is not that, these were the only friends. They had bigger group of people in the gang and they called themselves Katte gang, for the fun of it. They went from primary to high school, to pre-university like normal people. Though, they studied and enjoyed the primary school together, the fate moved them apart to different schools and college. But Gani and Jimmy always studied together till they completed the pre-university.
These friends, were always in the front line of activities in there child hood days. Jimmy was not that smart in nature, and typically would be a follower of Gani in lot of activities. As they grew older and entered into college, Gani, slowly picked up the habit of smoking and alcohol. It is not that, he used to do a lot, but to the standards of a Brahmin society it was a huge sin. Parents would have stuttered and puttered if any of them would have learnt about the vices of their dear ones. Their traditional upbringing never allowed them to even guess, their sons would have these vices. Jimmy, who always wanted to be front line, started to emulate Gani in these activities.
All the friends, were pretty good in studies and entered Engineering in reputed institutions. There were growing apart as individuals, as each one of them saw life in a different way in engineering and off-course because of new friends. They always had a meeting point with other friends at Katte. But relationship was not what you call as "Close Friends". But still they were friends, they kidded, fought, made fun of one another always.
When they all completed engineering, all the friends decided to go for a party at a Dhabba. Dhabba's were the common party points of the Katte members, and they decided to go to Dhabba on mysore road. Like any other Engineering kids, who drank alcohol, they started ordering Beer, Gobi Manchuri and Chilli Chicken in the Dhabba.
This is when, Gani started with a big show of smartness. Gani, started telling people, how Beer is just a soft drink, and other Katte members had to graduate to Whiskey. Not to be left behind the other Katte members, promptly displayed there choice of drink, starting from Khodays rum to Raja whiskey. Gani, not to loose any such arguments, displayed his vigor by displaying how he dilutes whiskey with beer rather than soft drink. Most Katte members, with common sense, understood the impacts didn't take up the idea.
Jimmy had never done this before, and as any person would do, wanted to try. He didn't show his emotions to his friends, and exclaimed, I have always done this and is good fun. This was more than enough for Gani's josh, and he started mixing and serving Jimmy. All the other members, saw the fun in offering and motivated Jimmy. As most of the drinkers would know, at the end of the session, Jimmy will not be in a state to even walk. The day which started with fun, slowly started moving towards tragedy, with Jimmy loosing control of himself.
All the well meaning Katte boys, didn't understand the significance of the state of Jimmy and took him to Manchinebele dam. Some of the guys, had a good swim. Jimmy tried to swim, but ended up in a dangerous situation of drowning. He had to be physically pulled up by atleast 5 of the Katte boys. This situation made most of the Katte members realize the gravity of the situation and quickly packed up and came to Katte.
Katte, as ever was a place of refreshing calmness to the members. They had a wash of face and legs in the refreshing borewell water. Jimmy started to regain some of his senses, but was feeling tired. It was a standard at Katte, typically after a party they would have masala puri and pani puri with extra onions before going home. It was theory of the members that, bad smell of onion had the ability to kill the little remaining smell of alcohol. Unfortunately, Jimmy, ignored the standards. As he was tired, he decided to go home and have a good sleep to get back his senses.
What happened in Jimmy's house is never heard of before in any place under the sun. Jimmy's mother noticed, the bad smell which was coming out his mouth. Like any other mother of Brahmin family (any caste for that matter), got agitated and summoned Rama into their house. Rama, was a bit worried, as he was part of the party and knew whats going to come. He made up his mind, prayed to his loving God, and went to Jimmy's house.
"What is that bad smell coming out of Jimmy's mouth, have you guys started drinking and all?" asked Jimmy's mother with eyes wide open. Rama, is more or less stunned with the sudden question, and the tone of the voice. He stutters a bit and with all sincerity, answers, "No Aunty!, he might have eaten some Non-Veg at the party".
It took, 3-4 years for Jimmy to recover from the double impact.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
For non cricket players, it is a very simple understanding that, bowling is the hard part of cricket. If somebody is ready to bowl, there would be many people queuing up to bat. In fact, there used to be fight amongst the Katte members to bat. There are also days when, batsmen used to get tired and SG used to bowl at wickets only. Yeah, I know the next question, SG had a very well built, exercise toned body. His fitness and strength is what made him follow his passion of bowling for long hours. No price for guessing, His other passion in life, was going to gymnasium and toning his body. SG was proud of his body, and one could see him checking up his biceps time and again.
Naturally, well built, health and body conscious SG was passionate about variety of carnal pleasure available in the world. SG was studying engineering, in a college in Bangalore (that is what all 12th crossed students did in Bangalore in ester years). If he was in a country like America, it was estimated that he would atleast have 2 kids by that time. But, unfortunately, he was bought up in a religious family in bangalore, and didn't have much options to follow-up his passion to check out the variety of carnal pleasures.
Gani, was highly creative and mischievous guy in the Katte gang. His creativity and mischievous nature, used to be terror amongst the decent bred people of the Katte gang. Gani had a special skill and affection towards, items, which would be called by well bred people as Gross (assayya). This love for gross items, more or less, kept the decent people away from him.
The Gods design was such, though SG and Gani can be termed as poles apart, they had a common bonding.
It was Porn.
Gani, because of his friends and connections had wide variety of porn material with him. In those days in Bangalore it was not difficult to get local Indian porn magazines, like debonair, rasika etc. But Gani was special, he had a collection of porn material from across the world. Primarily collection was from USA. Story goes that, Gani had some friends who were in America. And they were so fond of Gani that they were presenting porn material to him. Some friends, they were!.
It must be said that, most of the young adults in engineering, would have graduated from porn magazines to better stuff long time back. But SG was an exception in that case, where he enjoyed all varieties of porn stuff and took a pleasure out of it.
The trouble started when, SG borrowed some of porn magazines from Gani. Though borrowing was consistent ever vigilant mind of Gani noticed that all stuff didn't return back. The borrowing and giving back of the stuff, was done outside the realms of the Katte and the members were oblivious of this activity. Gani started asking for stuff back, but got some responses like "I have already given it back", from SG. This pissed Gani off. Point to be observed that, the stuff missing was like a spoon of water removed from the well. But, for Gani, it was more the question of ethics and principles than the stuff itself.
Gani was left in a situation, where he also didn't want to look childish in front of his esteemed Katte friends. He was supposed to be the knower of things, and not a man to reckon with petty things like cheap Porn magazine. In short, he had a reputation to save amongst the esteemed tribe. Gani, also claimed the experience of knowing lot of secret places of pleasure and also experience of having the carnal pleasure. Though, this has never been validated by anybody in Katte. But he was labelled, as knower of things.
Krishna, one of the esteemed member of Katte gang is known to be a do-gooder. He had this un-canny ability to be friends of all members of the Katte. Caste, creed, intelligence, childishness, wealth didn't matter to him. He was one of those guys who every one emotionally attached themselves with. It doesn't mean that, he cared for any one. But he allowed the people to build a sort of attachment with the niceness of Krishna. ah! the name Krishna, he was named after the legend very aptly.
Gani in the mean time, was burning with revenge in his belly. Very creative Gani, never short of ideas plotted a plan to take his revenge. But he had a problem, because of his reputation, SG wouldn't believe him. Trust is the core for execution of any plan, and Gani knew this. The first and the obvious person who came to his mind was Krishna. He shared his grief, and pain of the hurt ego with ever listener Krishna. Krishna, as ever, was always enthusiastic about activity of pulling legs and had trait of being master executioner.
He pledged his support.
Life went on, the entire Katte was oblivious of the revenge and the plot and plan.
One of those, evenings, when all the Katte members were sharing a cigarette and fighting for the last puff. Gani, started off with a story of another of his sexual experience. Typically, Gani's stories always were outside Bangalore and had very less relationship to Bangalore. Katte members always thought, this was what made his stories un-provable. Ears of all the Katte members shot up with a natural instinct to know about things. Gani started mentioning about a prostitute named Kamakshmi just in Banashankari. And her normal work area used to be the ring road near Kattriguppa. He ventured up with the whole story of how he got the contact, to the wonderful episode of his encouter with Kamakshi.
Like all of the katte episodes, all the Katte members were very eager in questioning and cross questioning Gani. Gani, a skillful story teller and conversationalist never hesitated and provided all the answers. The story, was also supported by Krishna, who had a friend who knows Kamakshi. The story, supported by 2 people, also involving do-gooder Krishna, sounded true. It was just an another day at Katte, after 1-2 peaceful smokes and talks about Gani's episodes all the Katte members went home. Only Krishna had shown the interest to convert dream to a execution and was questioning Gani on the details.
This is when, SG saw the opportunity and approached Gani and Krishna. There was an agreement that, SG, Krishna and Gani will try to have fun after 2 days. Gani was told to be near the Janata Bazar exactly at 8 PM, and Krishna and Gani will reach the same place at the same time. It was just, coincidence that all their home was in separate directions and the meeting place was a ideal point.
On the day, SG was full of vigour in his bowling. He was unplayable by the best batsmen of the Katte gang. He had a jump in his feet and was eager to do things fast. Katte members, oblivious of the plan didn't understand what has happened to SG. He didn't even practice after the match and decided to leave home early.
At home SG, dressed up like a groom, with a red shirt and nice new pants. He was with all eagerness and expectation dressed up like a model. Gave a reason of "meeting his friends" to his parents, took his scooter and reached ring road exactly t 7:45 PM. Ring road during those days, was scarcely populated area. Every women who happened to be traveling looked like Kamakshi to him. He waited till, 8:30 PM with all eagerness and anxiety. Neither Krishna nor Gani turned up. He started getting worried and called up Krishna's house from a pay phone. Krishna's sister picked up the phone and told him that, Krishna had already left at 7:45 PM.
SG got a little confidence and waited more in the ring road, obviously looking around for Kamakshi. (SG unfortunately didn't have the number of Gani's house.) He waited for more time, and called up Krishna's house again with the same result. The emotional balance of SG was shaken such that, he more or less had broken down to the level of crying. It was around 9:30 PM and SG called up Krishna's house again.
This time Krishna picket up the phone and told SG about the hoax. It seems the last words heard were, "Its ok Krishna uh its ok, it is only because uh you told I had come here, I wouldn't have trusted Gani... uh! uh!"
The story was told by Gani to the Katte in the full pomp and glamor and it was worth a 1000 rupees ticket as members watched SG's face as he entered Katte.
Disclaimer: All characters in this story are real and can have relationship with one and all. They can be found in any Katte, any gang, across this world.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
A satisfied Aane proposed to Katte members that, the occasion is worth celebrating and as a true follower of Katte principles offered to treat us all. (I do not remember exactly, if he was forced to treat, as per the Katte standards. But going by Katte constitution, we can conclude, Aane offered to treat the members of the katte). All the then-current katte members were invited to the party, to list a few, they were, kutti, kr, nacha, parang, myself, sridhara. If I have forgotten any of them, please forgive me, it is un-intentional, it is just that some of my memory cells have been killed over a period of time.
It was decided that all will meet up at the Katte (poojya sthala - place of worship, physically located at Kohinoor field in Bangalore south) the next day at 11 AM in the morning. From there the plan was to drive to a dhabba on mysore road. There was also an idea of all going to Manchainabele dam and have a swim after the party. It is always typical of the Katte members to have a party in the afternoon (for knowing the reasons, you need to pay up and buy the Katte constitution. Good things in life do not come free).
The reason for the decision on the place, time was, another wonderful party in the same location exactly an year back. The occasion was, not so zealous learners of katte, had completed engineering and decided to treat Aane (and nacha also I think .. without getting into too much controversy, I request members with there memory cells intact to comment on this) . In short, kutti, kr, sridhara, parang, nacha (??) and myself had hosted a party to Aane on the occassion of us getting out of engineering studies (yeah!, getting out makes sense). The party was wonderful because of a well known incident which has become a folklore (one of the members of the Katte will release it to public in a short time).
If you still do not understand, how big hearted Aane mari was and how he was a glowing example of "How a true katte member has to behave!!!", go, drown your nose in your piss filled palm till death.
On the day of the party, as decided slowly Katte members had trickled into Katte. By 11:15 all the treatees (people who are supposed to be treated) had assembled in the Katte waiting for the "treater". Aane mari had a amazing sense of time, Einstein would have created lot more formulas and filled up our text books if he had understood, the secret of what Aane knew. Aane being a true friend of stundents, never ventured out to share his ideas regarding time. He could never risk the sharing of ideas, because in this bad/ugly world, you never know who would mis-use it for the purpose of filling up text books.
As true Katte memebers, all the treatees understood that Ane's time was a secret from world and did not panic.
This was a such a period in universe when,
mobile phone was not affordable by students;
cable tv was the most hep thing;
bollywood heroins starting to wear bikinis;
king cost just rs. 2.25 only;
most students had a bike;
(Ananda, I am sure you do not mind the above)
Some of the katte members, called up Aane's house to enquire about well being of the treat. But they didn't get any response on phone. Nobody picked up the phone. After various deliberations and discussions, all the treatees decided to stay on and do Time Pass. One of the un-countable characterstics of Katte boys was, they never were short of ideas for Time Pass. If my brain cells are not corrupted, I think, our Katte manager ventured out brought the cricket equipments. It was a hot afternoon, and all katte members took the pleasure of playing box cricket.
When the time was around 2 PM in the afternoon, one of the members saw, Aane, with a characterstic smile entering through the majestic gate of Katte. Why Aane had a characterstic smile, was because of the very well satisfying annual-death-ceremony lunch he had had just then.
If you people, start thinking, this ended in a tragedy.
NO! No! no!
We being katte personified, still went ahead with the plans and celebrated the Engineer Ane. Though my memory cells are dead, I remember Aane even competed with kutti on the amount of food consumption competetion.
This incident has been, deliberated time and again in various gatherings of Katte, and how Aane could forget a thing like annual-death-ceremony lunch, but the knower will say, Aane, doesn't forget anything and his understanding of time, is not understood by the others.
If you think, the story is about the greatness of Aane, you are absolutely wrong. This is the greatness of the great Katte members, who inspite of the 3 hour delay on a hot afternoon, never lost hope and waited for the party. None of the members, obviously, wanted engineer Aane to loose the pleasure of treating his mates.
Monday, December 1, 2008
ತಲೆ ನಿಲ್ಲಲ್ಲ ಭುಜದ ಮೇಲೆ... ಅದ್ರು ನಾನು ಓಕೆ!! ೪
Now a days people are constructing different types of homes on thier own ideas like duplex home,bunglow etc etc. But as per my opinion that how much big you constructed a home is not an important rather how you live in that home is an important.
If you step up your home after finish your office work,late night parties,coming back from trip, etc etc you feel like " oh Mane Bantappa" i e Happiness,love and affection towards to your home i e so called "HEAVEN"., even if home is whether a rented house or own house, it is our sweet Home. Sweet Home is the place where I can find my roots, a place that will always be there, waiting for me to return.
A welcoming home is a perfect home. A home is a place to rest. There's no place except home which seems like heaven to us. A definition of home has no correct answer. Each individual's meaning is different. I associate home with feelings of comfort....
There is no end to define a SWEET HOME.
I play with designs and architecture all day
I create master software designs in everyway
People say, "Software engineers are in total dismay"
They also say this day for software engineer is a doomsday
It is our carefully chosen destiny is all I say
We are the ones who get a very high pay
When the sun shines, we do make our hay
When total economy is failing, we really don’t have our say
This is the ideal time to go for a long holiday
Forget all the pains and sorrows from office and getaway
And when we come back to office, let’s hope everything is just OK
For all those there, be patient and wait for another good day
Then we forget what happened yesterday, and rejoice Hip Hip Hurray!
Time will come when we can dance and sing again..Yay Yay Yay!
I am a software engineer and I am ok, till TODAY!
Saturday, November 29, 2008
The restless mind lets thoughts come and go incessantly from morning till night. They give us no rest for a moment. Most of these thoughts are not exactly invited, they just come, occupy our attention for a while, and then disappear.Thoughts resemble the waves of the ocean, always in a state of motion, never standing still. These thoughts arise in our mind due to many reasons. There is a tendency on the part of the mind to analyze whatever it contacts. It likes to compare, to reason, and to ask questions. It constantly indulges in these activities.Everyone's mind has a kind of a filter, which allows it to accept, let in certain thoughts, and reject others. This is the reason why some people occupy their minds with thoughts about a certain subject, while others don't even think about the same subject.Why some people are attracted to football and others don't? Why some love and admire a certain singer and others don't? Why some people think incessantly about a certain subject and others never think about it? It is all due to this inner filter.This is an automatic unconscious filter. We never stop and say to certain thoughts come and to others we say go away. It is an automatic activity.the mind is like a thought factory, working in shifts day and night, producing thoughts.The mind also gets thoughts directly from the surrounding world. The space around us is full of thoughts, which we constantly pick, let pass through our minds, and then pick up new ones. It is like catching fish in the ocean, throwing them back into the water and then catching a new ones. This activity of the restless mind occupies our attention all the time.
Now our attention is on this thought and then on another one. We pay a lot of energy and attention to these passing thoughts. Most of them are not important. They just waste our time and energy.It is as if some outside power is always putting a thought in front of us to pay attention to. It is like a relentless boss constantly giving us a job to do. There is no real freedom. We enjoy freedom only when we are able to still the mind and choose our thoughts. There is freedom, when we are able to decide which thought to think and which one to reject. We live in freedom, when we are able to stop the incessant flow of thoughts.
Stopping the flow of thoughts may look infeasible, but constant training and exercising with concentration exercises and meditation, eventually lead to this condition. The mind is like an untamed animal. It can be taught self-discipline and obedience to a higher power. Concentration and meditation show us in a clear and practical manner that we, the inner true essence, are this controlling power.so
We are the bosses of our minds.
I hope you guys like this essay.
When sharukh was still not a star
Nirma ,colgate, vicco vajradhanti were the only adds on TV
Lifebuoy was Indian National Soap.
Dwarka used to charge Rs.0.30 for extra chitney
Dolphin and Maruthi were high end cars……………………..
We guys used to meet in a park behind Bhandari Aspathrey to play markothi ata. All Nivedita school “B” section Guys probably 6th or 7th standard.
The members that time were
Nithin – nacha, most of the people never knew his name in 1st cross.
Kirana – katthey kirba and so on
It is this sport loving kids who are the originators of a tribe now called “Katte Boys”. This group continued to meet till they were in Nivedita School and dispersed during high school days as they went to diff schools.
Again this bunch of guys got united @ SKR. All these badmarsh guys were in the same batch except me who was a very sincere and studious guy, without any hard to digest ideas (in the company of pious guys like chik maheshi, srikara and Gokul in first batch @ 5.30 in the morning)
Nachas house was the one point of contact (no mobiles are gadi’s those days) and it was at this point of time hebbar became a member of gang and some old members got separated. It was during this time the tradition assembling in the world famous Kohinoor field started (ABC park) to play talemutso atha and hand tennis. When every body stopped coming (during 10th exams), it was only me and KSP who used to play tennis and later go for a walk and pani puri @ madheva.
It was after 10th when we got into our colleges we started playing cricket and other guys got introduced to the Kohinoor field. Guys like KR, vatsa, villi, nidhi, hemachandra, yogi, mani and others joined during this period.(villi was with Srom Team and mani with Kantha those days)
It was at this point of time, the now called katte had a lot of guys in its gang, including some guthalli and sunkenhalli super ಮ್ಯಾನ್'ಸ
This was the time when we guys got into habits like smoke and enne. Guys its because of these habits we started to sit on a katte in Kohinoor field and that’s how the name Katte Boys.
The katte again expanded when we got into professional courses. It was during this period, sripathy was the manger and controlled the happenings in Katte, he was called parang those days for his peculiar style of bowling.
The habit of going to dabas became more often and enne became the main menu of any treat, which earlier was a panipuri or bakery stuff.
This was the golden era of Katte, I have left some of the characters like S giri, chappaley, santhu , KSP, chottey and others as they were associated with kattey for a very short period of time. But for some events uniquely associated with them, I have to mention their names.
Some of the craziest things were tried, never to forget fights were seen, larger than Mtv fame Bakras were made (cyrus will feel shameful if he hears KR’s, S giri episode). Larger than life ideas were dreamt.
Any problem in the world have a solution, the slang lyrics were in fame, farting was a matter of honour.
The size of kattey and the activities started fading and glorious members went missing as they got into their jobs. At this point of time kattey was guarded by the tri murthis
K.dhara - KR.
Very rarely visited by me, mani, nacha and pathy. I got disengaged with kattey at this point of time due to constraints in my job.
I got associated with kattey again for a trip to Pondicherry, it was during this trip, “picturealli bear kudiyo” VSS got introduced (creater of the Blog).
When hebbav came back from Australia the trimurthis again started meeting in kattey and started the Friday night meeting. But this got some colour when group expanded by the addition of VSS, Sisya, Sadyo, very rarely me, atma and others.
Today the kattey has gone global and brought out the kavi’s in us. Personally I never taught our guys had so much talent to write. More shockingly our guys doesn’t look like
Let the kattey grow and and its members be remembered for what they are.
VSS is already making his son ready to be a Kattey boy. I am convinced this tribe will be alive in the coming generations to come.
Long live Kattey Boys.
Famous eat outs of kattey, their eating and drinking habits, tours of katte are to be told elaborately and in detail, hence not covered in this post.
Friday, November 28, 2008
This is an effort to understand what this actually means. what is the practical significance of this? Is this a corporate jargon or does it have a significant psychological meaning? can we use this in our personal life?
There are 2 things come out of definition from the corporate world,
1) emotional states of individuals might create issues
2) usage of third party perspective to resolve the issue
Emotion and problems with that:
Emotion can be defined as below, (This is my vice to create my own definitions of terms)
"A mental state of High (Positive Feeling) or Low (Negative Feeling). The effect of the feeling might result in happiness, sorrow, crying, frustration, anger, etc. "
The reasons for emotions are varied and specific to each individual. Children get a high by eating a chocolate, whereas an adult might need alcohol to get an high :-)
When a individual is in a mental state of High, individual is driven by the inertia of positiveness and sees the world around with goggle of positiveness. Without explaining much, I request the reader to think of situations where they were extremely happy. And how they perceived the world during that time of high. Think of scenarios like, the first time you got a cricket bat, you got your dream job, you did something out of complete concentration, etc. These scenarios, took you towards an emotional high which due to its inertia stayed on for a period of time. During that period, everything you saw, make you see the positive side of things.
An Example: To take a simple scenario, In my job profile I had to provide an architecture diagram for a complex business solution. The architecture was for a end to end life cycle of business process which I was not fully aware of. To start with the assignment, I was confused on where to start and where to end. But using the process of breaking the problem to few and solving it piece by piece, I came up with an architecture diagram which was instantly accepted by everybody who saw it. More than anything, I was satisfied with the effort and the out put.
I generally have a good 45 minutes walk home for the sake of health improvement. That day when I delivered the output, I could feel a jump in my walk (this is literal not figurative), I was singing a song very loud without aware of my surroundings, I easily ignored the other irritations in the office. I was on a High!! Everything I saw that day was good!, everyone was good!.
When a individual is in a mental state of Low, individual is driven by the inertia of negativeness and sees the world around with goggle of negativeness. Again I request the reader to think of scenarios where they have gone through this phase. There is so much of negativeness in this world, unfortunately this is a easier scenario to understand. To take an example of an forward email, where an individual fights with his wife for spilling of food on his shirt in the morning, and how he feels bad about traffic, his spoilt car, his inability to buy new car, screwed up boss etc. etc. He completely fails to see the good side of life that day because of the negative inertia.
This inertia of the emotion is what causes problems in life for the individuals. A person seeing the world with goggle of negativeness, sees anything and everything as negative without giving a consideration to the factual nature of the matter. This inertia of negative energy makes the person shout at people while driving, get people depressed seeing the traffic, make people hurt another individual, feel everybody hates me etc. etc. etc.
This inertia of positive energy, brings in foolishness, make a person forgets the compassion towards another individual, etc. etc.
According to Indian philosophy, emotional high or low are not considered to be effective way of experiencing life. Indian philosophy subscribes to the idea of individual being in the mental state of consistency (stitha prgna) to enjoy the Joy of life. This is exactly the median between the High and Low of emotion. I guess, we can call it the opposite of emotion.
Whenever an individual is on a emotional high or a low, it is typically a third party which will allow the individual to be pulled out of emotional inertia. There are various types of third party who help us come out of the inertia, The impact of each third party will differ on the proportion of inertia,
Sleep: Typically the lower proportions of inertia is lost over a very good sleep.
Movie/newspaper/life: There are times, when you see a thing, movie, hotel, office, and that provides a perspective which pulls us out of the emotional inertia.
Unknown individual: It so commonly happens that, when we are under emotional inertia. There is this person X, who gives a perspective with such conviction that it makes us think and helps us to get out of the emotional inertia. Wonderful thing is we might not even know that person.
Parents, Friends, Spouse - The people who are close to us are best equipped to give a perspective, which will pull us out of the inertia. The emotional bonding which we have with these individuals, helps us to see the light of the fact removing the negative elements. The Love, compassion, eagerness with which these relations deal with us, is what helps us think differently. It happens so often that, we do a certain mistake (however big the mistake is doesn't matter) and support of our loved ones, pulls us out of the negative inertia. Loads of bollywood movies are made on this subject :-)
Psychologists: Their are this breed of doctors/psychologists who have sessions with patients. Their main job is to listen to the patients thoughts on different subjects. They help the patient by giving a different perspective and help the patients see the light of the fact.
Doctor: Today's doctors have interesting medicine which plays around with the chemical composition of the brain to help us get out of the inertia of emotion. This is only used when the emotional inertia is in the advanced stages. Emotional attachment helps us to do different things, out of blind faith and trust, which typically kicks us out of emotional inertia.
Important fact to note here is, no individual can force another person out of the emotional inertia. Every individual comes out of the emotional inertia with his own efforts. It is just that design of the world, provides him/her opportunities to come out of the emotional inertia.
The best example is, all of us would have seen a fight in the streets because of some stupid problem. And I am sure most of us, would have gone through a similar type of a fight ourselves. But whenever we see it with the role of an observer, we invariably see the childishness and immaturity of the fight. But when we are ourselves involved in the fight, we are in such inertia of the negative mood that, we fail to see the obvious FACTS which we can see as an OBSERVER.
Typically for us to get out of this inertia, we get help from a third party. What third party provides us is, different perspective, which helps us to see the fact of the matter. But if we build this third-party-perspective in ourselves, we can always see the fact of the matter for ourselves without needing any help. This process will take us to "Stitha prgna" state and everlasting joy associated with that.